Let me preface this post by saying what a blessing being able to make this decision is. We are so lucky to have two healthy, bright, beautiful kiddos. I know several friends struggling to just have one. So this isn’t meant to be in your face, it’s just where our family is at right now. Or rather, where we’ll be at in another year or two (because I am soooo not ready for another one right now if that’s what we decide).
So, count our blessings and stop at two? Or the great big question asked by everyone with two who ever contemplated having others. Go one more time? I’d always assumed I’d have three or four kids, but to tell you the truth I am so fulfilled and bursting with happiness (and craziness) with two that I don’t know if I “need” another. Some days it feels like someone could be missing, who else could be in our family? Other days (or often times the SAME day) I’ll think man we’ve got it good, uncomplicated and we’re perfect as a family of four.
So the Great Pro and Con list…because there’s nothing like asking the internet to make important life decisions for you :-P
Yes, go for three:
Who else could be in our family? Ben and Cassidy are such fun, unique people, what other little person could join us?
Naming rights, yes, kind of the coolest thing ever.
We have a good, healthy marriage and enough love to give our two plus more.
Two is fun, would three be more fun? They’re not little and super exhausting forever…I love being one of 5 with step siblings (for the record we are NOT talking about 5). As adults we’re friends and have a blast together.
I liked being pregnant, enjoyed nursing and every little stage. I enjoyed Cassidy more as a baby than I did Ben, I think because it wasn’t uncharted territory. I know I’d thoroughly enjoy another baby.
Honestly, the idea of being the “perfect little American family” with one boy and one girl drives me crazy. I don’t want to be a cookie cutter perfect white picket fence family thank you very much.
Also, adoption is not off the table either.
No, stay at two:
We’d have to get another vehicle, probably a minivan. I don’t mind minivans but Andy hates the idea. We could squeeze three in my Ford Edge but then there’s no room for anything else (camping gear, whatever). Minivans these days are awesome, akin to spaceships with the sliding doors, extra storage, DVD players, dual control heat and AC, awesomeness…but it’s really the cost (20k) that gets me. Ouch, that’s a lot of K’s.
Kids cost money. Would we be better parents investing our resources (time, money, space) into two children vs spreading it thinner? Note: this does not apply to love…love is an unending resource!
I could go “back to work” sooner. I don’t think I’d ever work full time when kids are little, but I could definitely pick up more hours. If we had another we’d be starting all over again and it’d be more years until I could do that.
Bedrooms, we have two for the kids now, each have their own. Sharing rooms never killed anyone (or did it?) but it is nice, neat and easy with two kids and two bedrooms.
I did have really high blood pressure during/after pregnancy. That only increases with each baby and could lead to other problems.
Two is exhausting. Nuff said.
Andy is happy at two, I could go either way. We’ll sit/talk on it for a year or two, because like I said now is not the time if it’s going to happen. I wish I just “knew” but does it ever really come to you? Couldn’t you be at six kids and still have the pro/con list? Either way, thankful for these two lovelies <3
